seriosuly?? i don't know how long am i able to suppress the sadness in me. i don't care if i am being over sensitive or absurd i just know it hurts. Same questions questioning me over and over again..is this really what i want? y am i acting this way, yyyy??? lots of WHY life is meaningless sometimes. How can i get over it....should i just close my eyes and let things go but the worst thing is to assume everything is all right when it is not. can't breath, chock.

just feeling weird..things going too fast..not even long enough for a honey moon period....
should have listened...hiaz...
too late to turn back everything in life...

i feel like crying out...nothing going smoothly...
is it fated that i will be alone? or is just me thinking too much in everything?

no motivation in studying for Monday test!!! sob~~
hiaz....been lost and feeling empty this few days....life kinda boring and listless....
may be need to do something really crazy to neutralise it... -.-

is there really something wrong going on with me..i forget quite frequently.i can't memorize that much anymore....like something is missing from my brain....i can't live without a notebook anymore....hiaz....may be i got lao ren ci tai zhen...
so restless this few days..i really dun feel like studying anymore....is so tiring..T_T

i need listening ear, someone who understand, adore me, know what i'm thinking, scold me when i'm wrong...can all this be fits into a single person?

realise i been repeating the same mistake over and over again...and how am i going to correct it?

sometimes u just have to get use to the routine...
is hard to scream out whatever ur heart want to say, so just leave it...no use blowing it up..
alternatively, i can just hack care it, which i'm trying to.
(just like a bomb that will explode anytime in a jar)

i know this blog is left dead, and no one will come visit again... ha ha
Lots of school work and test flooding my mind this few days...
OK..is bored to mention work here...
today neck was feeling freaking pain in the morning and is really killing me when i went to school. Lucky my lovely friends is caring enough to buy me salnopas for me....ty to them... i feel much much better!!~~ touched T_T.
wanted to meet ...but because of my neck pain i can't ): really really sad... miss... hiaz...

lose and found?
sometimes thinking whether are they fake or real
trying to be real to get attention from ppl? I'm not sure is this what they are?
power,fame,act to be love, trying hard to steal...everything
aren't they exhausted?
may be i'm just sensative,but i just can't stop thinking of the possibility, i hate myself thinking abut it too..i never wanted it..but just can't be help.
I dunno when things gonna to be fix, but i know i'm exhausted from how i think abt them.
hope is not that way...
i know, but just can't help it.

NO CYN for me T_T
study week during CYN darn it!
hiaz... nvm oing to suffer now rather then in future...
after exam can enjoy and go out with dear and my friends le!!!!

Be thankful for the difficult times.
During those times you grow.
Be thankful for your limitations,
because they give you opportunities for improvement.

Be thankful for each new challenge,
because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes.
They will teach you valuable lessons.

Be thankful when you're tired and weary,
because it means you've made a difference.

It's easy to be thankful for the good things.
A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who
are also thankful for the setbacks.
Gratitude can turn a negative into a positive.

Find a way to be thankful for your troubles,

tutorials, lectures, many many...... full of EXCITEMENT everyday, how GREAT!
is totally stress, how i hope to have a long term break as fast as possible. Looking forward to the coming holiday which is around 27 of Feb? Next semester everyone who use to be in the same class have to be split up due to different course (polymer or industrial) really miss the fun we use to have.. hope to go back to that moment. Time pass fast and have to treasure every moment onwards.

ya...ok i changed my blogskin... life suck man!!
hiaz... just can't use any word or sentence to express it
will 2012 really end this world? if so i'm glad to welcome the day.
hope god will give a new start and i want a new life too....

ok..no mood mentioning about my studies..
reached home around 8.45pm,heard parents talking about my uncle..
Because his wife was sick and to need go back Malaysia to see doctor.
No one was looking after my sick uncle too!!! and everyone don't want to raise money to hire a maid for him... wa... darn piss off after listening to what my parents told me. My uncle is very sick and weak, and no one want to help?!! i know everyone have their own family, but is your brother leh?? you wish to see him suffer and die later?? happy ar??!! like how u all treat my ah ma?? who was my uncles mom. If it wasn't my dad, i think ah ma will die earlier than expected...because of their selfishness no one ever give my ah ma monthly income punctually, except my dad did and she have to use her own saving in the end.....Then when ah ma lying in the hospital going to die soon, no one want to sign for her hospital fee, all scared their own income will kana deduce off, SELFISH!!! end up all using my dad medisave -.- what the hell!!!! your own MOM LEH!!!!!!!!!!!! lying there going to die le leh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! waaa..i can't stand it....when listening i feel really very very up sad for my ahma in heaven and my sick uncle.

ya..is so dead....i know.....
but really very stress and tired to update... almost everytime i online is do homework and do research, so people out there be more understanding..hahaha... update more... going to do report le......

Been asked to update my blog by Liyi and Yiting...,so here it is.
last Monday i went to JE swimming complex with yt and liyi,we had lot of fun.
the last time i swam was last 3 years...lol..can't believe it man..
We wen to kfc to have our lunch,and yt was complaining the service was no good..
you should have seen her face,it was darn funny.
k ba...can't think of anything else..so just end here.
A big thanks to liyi and yt for this trip. (:

If my words are not enough for you
cut my heart with a knife and rip it outeven I have noticed
your excuses and hesitations
Will I hate someone like that again?If so, embrace me more and more
Like a thorn piercing your heart,let it remain in you forever
From now on, it would be better not to say anythingfor all your words are lies
If I repeat it over and overMaybe someday, my tears will reach the moon
Will I be able to love someone like that again?
When the time comes, surely, without a doubt,I can move on like the fragrant wind flowing over timeAlways, forever, endlessly…

(lyric)

it works really well especially for oily skin type....although i haven started using i see the results immediately,when she first letting us to try it's sample The pei pei promoter damn good in convincing people into buying their products man.....YOU can try out their products,i bet lots of tennagers will like it.i update the results after using it..so patience..haha

"I have seen lots of complaints about the difference in bus fare for poly and JC students.I totally agree that it is really unfair to those who study in poly.Moreover the government is encourage people to travel by public transport rather than cars,and it is important that the bus fare is reasonable and fair to everyone.I really hope the government can at least give an explanation or solve this problem" this is my comment to TODAY the newspaper,one of the voices regarding poly and JC bus fare. I hope more poly students can comment or write more about this problem,shout out yours voices today!! One day this problem might attract the government attention,when more people is discussing it....

Amy!!!i hate you!!!..ya..i hate myself..................!!!!! -.-
can i die now and be a guy in my next life??
i dunno.......i darn f*ck up...
hiaz......nvm.....i won't show it out......may be is just temporary!!yea.....!?not a big deal!!
may be just piss off.........but might be fine after sometimes.....
I HATE YOU,AMY TAN!! CHANGE MAN!!!!

yeah...!!today is my off day and so it is for the following 2 days,you know,i need some good rest~
haha...going to quit at the end of Feb due to studies.I think is time to give full concentration in my studies,i don't want to have nothing at the end...so much of education and at the end, i can't find my own place....-.-
Study is partially the reason,i don't really like the rules they've set over there.I will reconsider working again after I've got to know where am i going to study at....don't want to ask my parents for money.In additional, the economy is really bad now.SAVE ALL YOU CAN,PEOPLE!!!!
Just changed the blog songs,found it nicer and more meaningful than the previous,that's of course,because i didn't even know Japaneses.....
I can't wait to celebrate my cousin's birthday tomorrow... I'm going to order the food carefully,not too expansive.....lol!
ya...true...! the economy is really bad that u have to calculate how much after GST and service charge...-.- you've got to take a notice on the "big" difference between the original price and the one after GST and service charge.............

update!! yup....got back my results few days ago.i was darn disappointed with my math,got a b4 for it.I feel damn sad and sorry for my math teacher.
guess what i pass my English!! and is b4.I was damn happy with it,can't believe it!
haha! Hope i can get into biotechnology in sp,pray hard...



i want this car!!!!!!!!crystal man!!!! think it cost million..darn nice right?!

Back from work......hope on the 15 of jan i can get around 800 plus salary...or even more...haha...been working very hard for the last few weeks,so i expect more than usual.

cute right!!!!!

waaa..is hell!~!!!! my legs feel wobbly man!!
3 waitress outside serving customers. can you imagine the whole place is full of food on the floor and tables uncleaned,and customers have no choice,but to have their seats while we clean the table............... Baby's crying,people chatting,laughing,and ALL THE ORDERS FROM CUSTOMERS!! I was running instead of walking,not only me but the others too.The noise and 'floor' pollution filled up the entire secret recipes,it really gave me a urge to shout out loud...people will think I'm crazy,hack care! lol....Today was actually worst than x'mas eve.Thinking i have to face the same situation for tomorrow's work(new year'2009'),i really feel like taking a whole bottle of sleeping pills now...never wake up for tomorrow's work!!"is TORTURED"
no difference being a buffaloes helping a farmer -.- I'll make sure there's "DOUBLE PAY!!!!!!!!!"
ARGGGGGG!! " CAUTION: SR is hell to servers when it comes to eve day". nice for a headline in newspapers urh? -.- (joking)